The Dread House: POs

Long ago, in those halcyon days when we were still blissfully ignorant of the just how much work this house needed, we had the requisite house inspection. The inspector, frequently thwarted in his task by the POs' furniture filling every spare inch of space, still managed to present us with a Binder Of Ill Tidings about hazardous carpets, damaged walls, extension cords, unsecured toilets, etc. Scattered among these items and others was the frequent observation of, "Due to the cluttered conditions of $AREA, a complete visual inspection was not possible." When it came to the attic, "cluttered" was upgraded to "extremely cluttered", and he was unable to enter at all.

Lulled into believing that the month between inspection and closing would give the POs enough time to move all of their crap out, we were unprepared for The Stuff. (I was completely unprepared, living two hours away and not setting foot into the house until after closing.)

Closing time came and went; M generously gave the POs several more days to move The Stuff; they put a bit of money in an escrow account should it arise that The Stuff was not completely removed. It seemed like a reasonable amount of money, given what was left on the property and the complete and utter naive belief that normal people have - to wit, that other people are good and kind and don't leave heaps and heaps of filthy, flea-ridden shit behind for the rest of us to clean up. (I don't think I've mentioned the fleas before...)

However...both M and the real estate agent somehow managed to forget about the attic - the attic filled floor to rafter with what turned out to be the leavings not only of the POs but of the PPOs as well.

The escrow fund will not cover us renting more than the one dumpster already filled and taken away, so M has been hauling a bit out at a time and putting it by the curb. (Unsurprisingly, the agent has been unable to get the POs to sign the necessary form for the money for the dumpster to be transferred.) Occasionally, some ~~crazy~~ great people stop by and give our ~~piles of crap~~ glorious attic items a new home.

Here are some of our finds that are not old holiday crap, broken glasses, knives, encyclopedias, beer, old mail and tax returns, curtains, curtains, curtains, more curtains, or ancient vacuums:

Accordion. Might work - I attempted to play it and it made horrid, soul-killing, neighborhood-scaring sounds. I believe this is normal. Complete with hokey velvet-lined case.